It takes a creative and reframing mindset to see happiness. I’ve made a good living being creative--as a trainer, writer, and educator. Working in organizations and classrooms with limited resources and big “happiness” expectations takes innovative steps. Imagination has always been my strongest asset. Happiness requires imagination.
As a child, I stayed in the clouds, zoned-out into imaginative places and relationships I didn’t have. While in this make believe state, I played in my mental world of dancers and musicians, ran through meadows, and landed in a game or two of tag. The funny thing is these daydreams were not out of reach. I just stayed in my room or someplace else in the house, and didn’t step outside my front door to experience what I imagined. Happiness was playing in the thought clouds.
Lately, I’m noticing unimaginative ways several friends and family members are going about the task of happiness. In fact, there is a state of unhappiness and struggle with inner peace. I hear stories like, “He’s not here with me, so I’m not happy.” Other talk goes, “Don’t tell me what to do, you’re not my Daddy,” disguised as a belief that another person has total power over you. In these patterns I see one thing for sure--that there is misery and suffering submerging in a deep well of despair.
It took me three decades to understand that I was responsible for my own happiness. An extra decade flew by when “I got it” that I was the architect for much of my stress. In Buddhism, stressful feelings are referred to as suffering. Early in my practice, the word “suffering” made me very uncomfortable because it just felt too depressing. Did acknowledging suffering mean sitting in a state of depression as a part of a mindful meditation practice? No, it didn’t. But I did have to look deeply at the word suffering and adjust how I thought about it.
I read an article in an old issue of the Buddhist publication, Mindfulness Bell, that talked about shifting the feelings of suffering into a way of well-being. I really liked that word combination, well-being. The idea of practicing well-being was something I could easily sign up for! What I needed was a tangible way to see this “well-being” happen in my life.
What I learned reading another article in Mindfulness Bell was the notion that we all carry seeds within us, and these seeds are watered daily by our mindsets. If my mindset grabs the garden hose that pours life giving appreciations to every encounter with another person, take nothing for granted, and enjoying my next breath, then I feel at peace. I water the seeds of peace. I grow. Experiencing peace happens when there is harmony between your inner and outer landscapes. Expectations of others or attachments to things, people, and ideas are released, clearing space to make room for the present moment as the most important and precious experience. It’s the ability to notice and see the reality of right now. This is well-being.
There are times where I water my seeds with buckets of worry and fear. Polluted liquids overrun my mind and leave a heavy heart, fatigue, and detachment crud all over my seeds. I make up scary stories that frighten my tongue to say mean-spirited things to myself and others. It’s a spiraling down into a deep well of dark forever. Pulling out of that hole takes conscious work.
One remedy is to reach for my canvas of peaceful visual images.
For years, I’ve worked with collage as a way to express a visual feeling of tranquility and harmony in my life. To build a collage, select a blank piece of canvas and grab a glue stick. Then there’s the hunt for just right magazines with lots of pictures. I capture armfuls of old National Geographic, O Magazine, Boho, Essence, Fast Company, Shambhala, and Yoga Journal which offer pictures that speak 1,000 words. First I start by selecting an image of how I see myself. A bronze toned face with shoulder length locks is a picture that appears somewhere on my canvas. Ocean tides, a hiking path among very old trees, and journals with fine writing pens typically splatter on the emerging landscape. Candles lit sparingly and an emblem of stillness typically top off foodie choices of fresh vegetables and exotic fruits. The kaleidoscope of images help me focus on what is possible.
My collage acts as a visual writing prompt for me to take my fountain pen and show and tell what I see on a blank page. Sensations, smells, tastes, and sounds come alive as my imagination seeks and finds the right words the canvas speaks. Possibilities are revealed. The words show me how to live the imagined. This is an act of transformation.
There is an adage attributed to the Buddha that goes:
The thought manifests as the word.
The word manifests as the deed.
The deed develops into habit.
And the habit hardens into character.
So watch the thought and its ways with care.
And let it spring from love,
born out of concern for all beings.
I’m watering seeds of love, happiness, and peace, in perfect and imperfect ways, through my thoughts, words, and actions. It is a journey to well-being.
In practicing peace and happiness,
Yvette
